I don’t have a homemade Bobba Fett costume, so I didn’t attend Comic Con this year, but Megan Fox did. And Megan Fox in a room full of guys who jack off to anime can’t be good. News.com.au reports:
This year, Johansson was the headliner, promoting Iron Man 2, but it was an appearance by Megan Fox which had the geeks talking after one fan approached the star during a Q&A to promote her new supernatural western Jonah Hex. “My question is for Megan,” the man said. “I have a Sony HVR (video camera). It’s not a true HD, but it gives a pretty good image. Anyway, my question is: I just graduated film school and I’m trying to help my career. I was wondering if you’d be interested in some kind of, like, celebrity sex tape?” With that, a couple of security guards grabbed the fella and took him to an undisclosed location. “Dude, I can’t wait to see what you look like in 30 minutes,” Fox’s co-star, Josh Brolin, quipped as the man was dragged away.
Maybe it was because she was surrounded by dudes with phaser gun keychains and their names written in their underwear or whatever, but she wasn’t like this when we made our sex tape. Of course she was a little timid at first because I had to use a shoehorn to get my penis in her ass, but after a few minutes she started to relax. Her lawyer claims that’s when the alleged ether kicked in. But what does he know of love?
My girlfriend attended something called The Myspace / IGN Jennifer’s Body Party last night and, of course, she looked hot as hell. To be honest, I really don’t think there’s a scenario where I wouldn’t try to pound Megan Fox’s vagina into a fine powder. She could be under attack by bees or changing into a werewolf, and my penis would need a holster for how fast I would pull it out.
BTW, I’m usually not one to kiss and tell, but we totally did it last night. I’m only saying it, because a stupid photographer took the following picture after Megan climbed off me. Why can’t people just leave us alone?!
I really have no idea why it took me so long to post these, because this is basically a Megan Fox fan site and I post every Megan Fox picture no matter how annoying or asinine, but for the record, you’d need a treasure map to get my dick out of her ass. I’d be so deep I could restart the rotation of the Earth’s core.
ShockTillYouDrop, pulled an exclusive out of their ass and got their hands on the red band trailer for Megan Fox’s new horror-comedy, Jennifer’s Body.
She took on wise-crackin’, leg-humpin’ robots in Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, and now Megan Fox is wielding a voracious appetite and going head-to-head with Amanda Seyfried in Jennifer’s Body, 20th Century Fox’s horror offering arriving on September 18th. Screenwriter Diablo Cody (Juno) whipped up this hellish tale about a high school cheerleader (Fox), screwed over by a visiting rock band, who becomes possessed by a demon and begins to feed off of the fellas in her town.
Zombies and demons should really look into hot chicks. It would definitely make it a little easier on them. Megan Fox could tear my leg off after she finished my liver and there’s a good chance I’d probably still cum at some point.
I realize this has absolutely nothing to do with celebrities or me, so I probably really shouldn’t be posting this, but I’d really like you to meet Jeremy Lloyd Martin – the dumbest fucking dude on Earth. Splash News says:
Meet the man accused of being so upset at how McDonald’s handled his order he called 911 – and ended up being arrested himself. Jeremy Lloyd Martin, 23, is said to have flipped out when he was only handed a single burger and fries and told to pull away from the fast food restaurant in Clackamas, Oregon. He is accused of calling 911 and being told: “Sir, this is not a police matter.” He then allegedly called back to demand officers were sent over. “This is a 911 emergency,” the caller said. “I got robbed for eight dollars.” “Sir, 911 is life-and-death only,” the dispatcher said. “If you do continue calling 911 you will be arrested for misuse.” The furious caller then said: “Well, arrest me. Send a cop right now. I swear to God all my life…” Martin was arrested at the scene. He later stood by his actions in a radio interview. “I was very upset that they tried to charge me for food I had already paid for,” he said. “For me to end up going to jail over a $10 order, that’s just ridiculous”.
I’ve sat here, I’ve tried, but I can’t for the life of me think of a reason why I would call 911 because Consuela or some recovering meth addict with the fresh tat on her neck got my order wrong at a drive thru. You know how not to get your order wrong at a drive thru? Don’t go to a fucking drive thru. In case you didn’t know, McDonald’s isn’t exactly SAS or Google. You’re lucky the person behind the window isn’t beating the cash register with a brontosaurus bone or being amazed by fire. In hindsight, I’m pretty sure this dude will realize he’s an idiot. Just like the UWO Pi Phi’s did after they called 911 because I was too sexy. Hey, ladies, no need to be like that. We got all night, baby.
Since this post is completely random, let’s keep the party going with yet even more randomness – Megan Fox’s damn near perfect body. You’re welcome.
In this time of tragedy and loss, it’s always good to reflect on the beauty in life and try to remember that life is fleeting and we should appreciate each moment like it was our last. Or whatever gay shit I can say that would be a good intro to post pictures of Megan Fox and her hot ass leaving The Late Show with David Letterman last night. I realize I post about this whore way too much, and I probably won’t for a while, but do you really want another Michael Jackson post? You can’t. I mean, just look at the banner picture. Megan seems rather offended by your suggestion.
The fact that Megan Fox has her thumb in her mouth and my girlfriend had her thumb in her mouth last night isn’t lost on me, so I took it as a sign to take the opportunity to post pictures of Megan at the Seoul premiere of Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen yesterday. I have no idea who or what this “Fallen” they’re referring to is, but we can go ahead and rule out my penis.
Yeah, so, here’s Megan Fox at the premiere of The Transformers: Revenge of The Fallen, and sure, I could say that she’s pretty at that I want to squigee her clitoris with my tongue, but quite frankly, I think it would be kind of redundant with the card and present I just sent her and all. I really hoped she liked everything, especially the heart. That homeless guy seemed pretty attached to it.
The full scans of Megan Fox in GQ are finally out, so here they are. I wasn’t going to post these, because this is basically a Megan Fox fan site, but my penis twirled his mustache then kidnapped a damsel and tied her to a railroad track. “You’ll rue the day,” he exclaimed, “Rue it!”
At this point, other than trying to get her half naked on their cover, I’m not sure why magazines want to interview Megan Fox. Because, well, chances are good that she wont make it five minutes without saying something really stupid. Congrats, British GQ! Showbiz Spy reports:
“When you think about it, we actors are kind of prostitutes,” Fox tells the July issue of British GQ. “We get paid to feign attraction and love. Other people are paying to watch us kissing someone, touching someone, doing things people in a normal monogamous relationship would never do with anyone who’s not their partner. It’s really kind of gross. “I have this sort of promiscuous image. People assume I’m really overtly sexually aggressive and that I’m this wild child. And I’m not like that at all. “I would rather have an image that is wild and promiscuous than to go out of my way to be proper all the time.“There are some guys who think I’m going to be this little cupcake who’s going to bat my eyes and be like a receptacle for them. I shut them down immediately.”
Ugh. Megan, I love you, I do, but baby, pretty please, shut the hell up. You want to know why people think you’re “overtly sexually aggressive”? Let’s see, hmm, maybe its the Esquire interview? Or how about the other GQ article? No wait, maybe it was every other article or interview. Look, you can’t throw me an idea then say I have the wrong idea. Magazines aren’t claiming you’re Andrei Chikatilo or Jack The Ripper, you’re saying this stuff. I think you just need to take a long look in the mirror and think about what image you want to portray. Now turn around. Then squeeze your nipples for me. Oooh yeah, baby. You like that?
